Sunday, November 19, 2006
Thursday, November 16, 2006
Sunday, October 29, 2006
Saturday, October 28, 2006
Who needs to drink on the job when you have awesome entertainment like that ;)?!
Sunday, October 22, 2006
Saturday, October 21, 2006
As for the t-shirt Tyson was wearing, its for Maryland Republican Senatorial candidate Michael Steele (Karl Rove's head hits desk with audible thud).
Wednesday, October 18, 2006
In a well-known town by the sea in a remote and beautiful part of south-western Ireland, there's history, politics, and commerce for starters. Dingle, or, to give it its proper, official name these days, An Daingean, is in County Kerry... Last year, a new law meant Dingle's official name was changed to An Daingean... They argue that the internationally-known "Dingle brand", familiar to people in the US, the UK and beyond, is in danger of being lost.
I'm trying to think on the bright side.
"Halloween is a good time of the year to have extra facial hair!"
"Who needs the Groucho Marx glasses?" My green frames are pretty thick and with a cigar, I could probably be admitted to my friend's Halloween party (costume fragment demanded for entrance or you get one at the door). They used to look like this:
All of this is devolving into bad self-imagery. I was looking at myself before getting in the shower and saw an emoticon staring back at me. It wasn't :-| or even :-), it looked more like :-O.
Sunday, October 15, 2006
While I'm on a roll, I just wanted to let all of my friends and family know that I think I'll be married soon... in about ten years :P.
Tuesday, September 26, 2006
on that all important
bookmark. Leather, paper,
tattered from wear.
on a theme of William Carlos Williams
What I need more is coffee, then sleep, then lots of coffee. I need there to be a paypal system for sleep where friends and family can donate hours to me. Maybe my Mom could hold a telethon too.
Monday, August 28, 2006
Wednesday, August 09, 2006
A rock-music fan seriously injured during a concert at this year's Street Scene in Mission Valley has “vastly improved” and is expected to survive, a police official said Wednesday. The man, whose name has not been released, was one of three people who suffered serious head and chest trauma when spectators rushed the stage during a performance by the band Tool on Saturday night.
I haven't been back since I was caught in a major traffic jam of people trying to get to the Jack Johnson stage. The year I went SS was held in the Gaslamp. We were boxed in by the trolley line that bisected the venue (one to file under "what were they thinking?!"). When the police tried to compress people to one side or other of the tracks on the road to Jack Johnson's area, hundreds of people were penned into a fenced patch of asphalt with no way out. We never even made it to Jack Johnson and took the trolley home. We had experienced a semi-traumatic event, but there was no mention of it in the coverage of the 'great Street Scene success'.
I love the idea of Street Scene, but I have too much to live for to die at a rock concert. With my luck it would be near a lame band stage I wasn't even trying to get to. My family and friends' grief would be mixed with stunned emotion as they pondered why I had died trying to see Yanni or Paris Hilton. (She is repackaging herself as a singer, no kidding). The Street Scene organizers have two duties. First, they need to work on crowd control and security. Second, the artists need to stay at a high caliber, so if people continue to be injured, they can say, "Ya, I lost a leg, but it was so worth it to see Tool, man!"
Tuesday, August 01, 2006
TOTAL FOOTPRINT 15
IN COMPARISON, THE AVERAGE ECOLOGICAL FOOTPRINT IN YOUR COUNTRY IS 24 ACRES PER PERSON.
WORLDWIDE, THERE EXIST 4.5 BIOLOGICALLY PRODUCTIVE ACRES PER PERSON.
IF EVERYONE LIVED LIKE YOU, WE WOULD NEED 3.4 PLANETS.
Thanks for the idea, Happy!
Sunday, July 30, 2006
Hokkien Chinese Ah Chwar (snake)
Khiow Khoo (hunchback)
Chow Tow (smelly head)
Sor Chai (insane)
Karrupusamy (black god)
Woti (sexual intercourse)
Gwyneth Paltrow, who has a baby named Apple, would have been out of luck in Malaysia. Is Jade a color? I thought it was a symbol of good luck, but could also be out. "Parents will not be able to call their babies after animals, insects, fruit, vegetables or colours."
Thursday, July 13, 2006
In general, the rules for marriage are similar to the rules for being in a lifeboat on the open ocean: don't crowd each other, no sudden moves, and keep all disastrous thoughts to yourself.
In searching for it, I found another great quote about the perfect woman:
The perfect woman is the woman who you love to converse with and who you want to tell everything to. The moment you have a big experience, you want her there to listen to your account of it. Her take on things fascinates you, her talk is pleasurable to you, and you love her company. That's what you want in a companion.
Is this true? Do men change at a specific age? The ones in my age range seem to be a lot more shallow. Maybe that's SoCal for you?
Wednesday, July 12, 2006
Saturday, July 08, 2006
YOUR PORN STAR NAME
(your first pet, the name of the first street you lived on):
This formula works!
YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME
(grandfather/grandmother on your father's side, your favorite kind of candy):
YOUR FLY GIRL/GUY NAME
(first initial of first name followed by "izzle", first two or three letters of your last name followed by "dizzle"):
(I'm sure Snoop would pronounce it "sizzle").
YOUR DETECTIVE NAME
(favorite color, favorite animal):
Sounds like a bar.
YOUR STAR WARS NAME
(first 3 letters of your name- last 3 letters of mother's maiden name, first 3 letters of your pet's name repeated twice):
YOUR SUPERHERO NAME
("The", your favorite color, the type of car you drive):
The Blue Expedition
Thursday, July 06, 2006
The stranger episode occured yesterday when North Korea test fired the Taepodong-2 and the Nodong missiles. I know I'm not the first to note this, but wonder if anyone has tried telling them?
Dear North Korea,
The word "dong" is a nine on the Beevis and Butthead snickers scale. You people need to get out more often or order Berlitz Does English. If you're going to try and get up in our grill on our national holiday, try naming your weapons something a little scarier and less antiphallic. A few suggestions:
P.S. Kim Jong, speaking of unmanly things, please work with the hair! Are you trying to give Donald Trump a run for his worst-hairdo-on-a-rich-guy ever or what?!
Sunday, July 02, 2006
Saturday, July 01, 2006
Call me fussy, but I don't want to pull on a drawer handle every day that's called the jerker.
Okay so the Anes bed frame name has a little circley thing over the top of the "A". By my junior high humor standards, it still looks and sounds too close to that planet between Saturn and Neptune.
Sunday, June 18, 2006
To laugh often and much: To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children, to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others, to leave the world a bit better whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you lived. This is to have succeeded. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Happy Father's Day to all the good dads reading!!
Sunday, June 11, 2006
Retch I Sin
Tech In Sir
Rice Thins (Rejected cracker?)
Cries Thin (Don't I wish!)
Chi Ne Stir (Sort of French for 'Don't Stir My Chi'?)
Rich Stein (Only the Good Beer)
Rich Set In (Any time now, go ahead!)
She Nitric (Super Hero?)
Her Sit Inc
Re Shit Inc (Not making this up!)
Monday, June 05, 2006
|You Have Low Self Esteem 8% of the Time|
Which can be translated to mean, you have high self-esteem and a healthy sense of self worth.
You believe in yourself, and you know how to be the real you. You love yourself, imperfections and all.
This is for all my pals with love ills. I won't even mention your initials. You know who you are.
And for all people filled with fear and loathing, some Sinatra:
That's life, that's what all the people say.
You're riding high in April,
Shot down in May
But I know I'm gonna change that tune,
When I'm back on top, back on top in June.
Ignore that the song ends this way:
But if there's nothing shakin' come this here july
I'm gonna roll myself up in a big ball and die
Tuesday, May 30, 2006
Making Banana Bread/Tabblo Take 1.
Thursday, May 18, 2006
P.S. Why are there so many people who have pictures of plungers?
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
While I'm talking about carb options... has anyone else ever noticed that Trader Joe's Yogurt O's don't get soggy in milk? Don't get me wrong. I really like the taste, especially the kind with the dried mango. They are like rocks though - even with some soak time. I think I chipped a tooth eating them.
That honey of a phrase is going to push some funky traffic to my blog - I know it!
What should my new handle be???
Tuesday, May 09, 2006
Thursday, May 04, 2006
Monday, May 01, 2006
I would like to ask my grandma what stitch she used for the half complete afghan I want to finish.
I would ask Clara why she married Charlie the second time.
I asked my grandpa the questions I had. The best advice he gave me was that it takes that real strong feeling for someone to keep a marriage going (both of you). You could get by with almost anything if you had that.
I'd ask my other grandpa how he kept his african violets so nice. I have instructions, but I just can't seem to get them as healthy as his were.
Tuesday, April 18, 2006
Or maybe I should just go for the wife's look. I'm getting closer by the day! Stuff that used to look sexy looks more like a flesh explosion. /self loathing
In a follow up to my original kilt post, I want to inform the public that a kilted astronomy club, or rather a regiment within said organization, exists right here in California! Yes, 'tis true.
I can't find an explanation of how they decided to wear utilikilts, which mystifies me. Astronomy is a night activity and while Sacramento gets really hot, it seems like star gazing is more suited to pants. Am I missing something?!
Thursday, April 06, 2006
Which Tarot Card Are You?
You are the Empress card. The Empress is the archetype of the Mother. She creates and nurtures life. She represents the abundance of Mother Earth. The Empress is capable of using nature in a productive way. She espouses art for art's sake. Her planet is Venus, and she embodies love of beauty and a strong value system. Here is also found initial sensation. This is the first really physical experience of the world that The Fool has entered. The Empress has a rich understanding of the world based on her five senses. In a reading, The Empress represents pregnancy, actual or metaphorical. She indicates an act of creation and a sensual experience of beauty. The Empress is a nurturing force that wishes to see the product of her experiences reach the next stage of development. Image from A Photographic Tarot http://www.bluewitch.com/healingtarot/healtar.htm Deck
Take this quiz!
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Monday, March 27, 2006
Sunday, March 26, 2006
I mean that affectionately of course! Friday included a line up of my favorite places. We started with Cafe Sevilla. The Food TV network was there filming. Mom, Matthew and I split tapas, while KC had a skewer of shrimp. The Dizzy's show was really enjoyable. We followed it up with MORE dessert.
Wednesday, March 22, 2006
I can only guess that they have the same plastic surgeon.
This is just a randomly disturbing image of Barry for your amusement. I love that the image has the keyword "Chicagocrotch" (hurl):
Wednesday, March 15, 2006
If the hummus doesn't get me, the utilikilt site surely will. I've seen a couple guys wearing these around campus. I thought they were in a club, but this makes me unsure. It sounds like a man's lib movement. I don't know why anyone would elect to wear skirts if they didn't have to. Skirts are for big women who can't fit into pants and for skinny women who's thighs don't rub together. The rest of us only wear them to look good. This is probably my favorite pic. What's a bear with *no* pants or skirt gonna say to you?!
Tuesday, February 28, 2006
Sunday, February 26, 2006
"Death has a tendency to encourage a depressing view of war."
"Control your time. If you're working off your in-box, you're working off the priorities of others. Be sure the staff is working on what you move to them from the President, or the President will be reacting, not leading."
"Don't be a bottleneck. If a matter is not a decision for the President or you, delegate it. Force responsibility down and out. Find problem areas, add structure and delegate. The pressure is to do the reverse. Resist it."
"Don't blame the boss. He has enough problems." (spoken like a true boss :-D)
"Don't necessarily avoid sharp edges. Occasionally they are necessary to leadership."
"Don't say "the White House wants." Buildings can't want."
This one's for Cooper:
"From where you sit, the White House may look as untidy as the inside of a stomach. As is said of the legislative process, sausage-making and policy-making shouldn't be seen close-up. Don't let that panic you. Things may be going better than they look from the inside."
"I don't do quagmires."
"I'm not into this detail stuff. I'm more concepty."
Keep your rules limited to the number of fingers you have:
"If you develop rules, never have more than ten."
"Oh my goodness gracious, what you can buy off the Internet in terms of overhead photography. A trained ape can know an awful lot of what is going on in this world, just by punching on his mouse, for a relatively modest cost. "
"People say, 'Well, where's the smoking gun?' Well, we don't want to see a smoking gun from a weapon of mass destruction. "
Kind of scared to see the Powerpoint that goes with this one (pruning people :O):
"Prune - prune businesses, products, activities, people. Do it annually."
Say this one three times fast:
"There are known knowns. These are things we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say, there are things that we know we don't know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we don't know we don't know. "
Did Rummy work in academia?
"Watch for the "not invented here" syndrome."
Okay, maybe not because they all seem to be vacant this long:
"Watch the growth of middle level management. Don't automatically fill vacant jobs. Leave some positions unfilled for 6-8 months to see what happens. You will find you won't need to fill some of them."
"You will launch many projects, but have time to finish only a few. So think, plan, develop, launch and tap good people to be responsible. Give them authority and hold them accountable. Trying to do too much yourself creates a bottleneck. "
I love the added caption on this one:
Friday, February 24, 2006
Tuesday, February 21, 2006
My boyfriend and I broke up a couple weeks ago. It was my doing and I don't have a right to be mopey. I'm taking a class and we're reading from the romantic period. I am not in the mood. I just want to stick all the whiney, romantic characters in the eye with something sharp. "Take that fool! Why did you think it would work out?!!"
My new favorite song is "Jealous of the Moon" from Nickel Creek's new album:
Trying on a brand new dress
But you haven't worn the old one yet.
You've come too far, to turn around now.
Giving up a good fight.
You're as strong as anyone.
You're back when you started from,
I see you're back where you started from.
Staring down the stars, jealous of the moon
You wish you could fly.
But you're staying where you are,
there's nothing you can do,
if you're too scared to try.
Drag your pretty head around
Swearing you're gonna drown with a beautiful sigh and a river of lies.
I hate to see a friend of mine,
Laughing out loud when she's crying inside,
but you've got your pride.
I think blogging nullifies the pride claim :P.
Sunday, February 19, 2006
Dannon's new yogurt, Activa, contains a special bacterial culture known as Bifidus Regularis that helps to regulate the digestive tract. To help promote their new product, and perhaps to locate potential markets for this breakfast-food-come-Milk of Magnesia-competitor, Dannon commissioned a survey to determine the most irregular cities in America. The survey defined irregularity as not going to the bathroom for two or more days and found that the ten most irregular cities are:
1. Orlando, FL
2. Memphis, TN
3. Greenville, NC
4. Tampa, FL
5. Raleigh-Durham, NC
6. San Antonio, TX
7. Oklahoma City, OK
8. Jacksonville, MI
9. Miami/Fort Lauderdale, FL
10. Philadelphia, PA
What I want to know is, how did they determine which cities are most irregular? I can't think of a single source of that information.
Saturday, February 18, 2006
Iranians rename Danish pastries
Bakeries across the capital, Tehran, are covering up signs advertising the pastries and replacing them with ones bearing the dessert's new name.
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
Damien: Ah, you're trying to do a David Lee Roth.
Me (to KC): I want to see you in those pants!
Damien: Those assless chaps?
BRAIN WAVES CEASED
KC: They're called "bottomless chaps".
Damien: No, assless chaps.
KC: Bottomless chaps.
Me: I meant the parachute pants! (from the Might As Well Jump video)
Monday, February 13, 2006
Saturday, February 11, 2006
Thursday, February 09, 2006
Wednesday, February 08, 2006
* Mail my Christmas newsletter. Hmmm, more like my Valentine's Day newsletter now.
* Work on my jigsaw puzzle.
* Catch up on Netflix. It seems wrong to spend sunny days indoor watching TV.
* Taunt my friends at work over IM.
* Do homework :P.
* Cook something really good for dinner.
* Recover those three unmatching dining room chairs.
Any suggestions about what I should do tomorrow? How would you spend it?
Saturday, February 04, 2006
Tuesday, January 24, 2006
Thursday, January 19, 2006
I didn't find a good picture of it, but I did learn that Kentucky has a llama and alpaca association. You'll be relieved to know that they have full meeting minutes on their web site.
I spent most of high school in a green, wool Benetton sweater. By my senior year, my friends were begging me to throw it out. It was cozy, kind of like a security blanket. I should make some quilting squares out of it. That would require some skill and effort though. It wasn't like any sweater I could find online. With some digging, I should be able to find myself in a picture wearing it.
Can you believe the head of Benetton has such help-me-find-the-words press photos? Look, he's making the baglady a new green sweater!
Something else could be said about bearded circus ladies. I enjoy people who enjoy it when people laugh at them. I think I would be really depressed if I wasn't amused when people think I'm weird :P. Must be a coping mechanism I developed.
Tuesday, January 17, 2006
Thursday, January 05, 2006
Tuesday, January 03, 2006
Why hard work makes people happy
Hard work may be the last thing people want as they return to their jobs after the festive break, but experts say it could be the key to happiness.
"From our research the people who were most active got the most joy. It may sound tempting to relax on a beach, but if you do it for too long it stops being satisfying."